Pineapple as a Sovereign Flag for Bull$hit

Recently several swarthy yet clever art students managed to sneak an average-nothing-so-special grocery grade Pineapple into an art exhibition

Pineapple in Scotland

“… part of the Look Again festival, which aims to highlight Aberdeen’s cultural heritage — they were shocked to discover their pineapple protected by a glass display case, instantly and mysteriously transformed into a work of art.” –NYTimes

Don’t play coy with me boys

I’ve been to art college, and beauty school both. I know a “snehaha” (sneaky + haha joke ) project when I see it made 20min before class! I’ll even bet an Art Skoop Graphic TShirt that this plan was hatched over a bottle of cheap wine and a late night tambourine jam session.

Their execution was simple,

  1. Buy pineapple
  2. Set pineapple on stand in Exhibition Hall
  3. Put glass cover on top of pineapple
  4. Sit back and watch the critics swoon
  5. *OK maybe they had help from the janitor on the vitrine part.

In fact, had the students ( Lloyd Jack & Ruairi Gray) never confessed to the making of this mockery, and pawned this off as Conceptual Art,  they might’ve become the next Duchamp. The article continues,

The fruit cost one pound, or about $1.30.

Nevertheless, he [L. Jack] said, the pineapple, alone in its display case and destined to rot, was a poignant symbol of Britain in the era of “Brexit,” the nation’s decision to leave the European Union.” –NYTimes

This Pineapple raises the (albeit tired) question:

Is it art?

Is this pineapple worth this cause célèbre? My usual response: “Does it matter?” Even though these students were trying to be funny, they ended up finding a academic explanation for their tomfoolery. This is normal. People (crazies, critiques and curators) often find meaning  in “art” where there is none. Its all internal manifestation psycho babble. But I have my own explanation of how this whole event unfolded.  

The art world is like a cocktail recipe:

 

2-parts who you know

1-part “where was your last show?”

1-part snake oil salesmen / con job

Garnish with talent and years of study

Serve generously in a champagne flute

 

If you get there ratio right, your pineapple could be famous, and so could you. Add too much of one ingredient and you might be mistaken as an Art Dealer. Add too little of one ingredient and you might end up working in a museum. OH! watch the garnish! Too much garnish and you’ll come off as desperate; willing to show your business cards to any warm body at the bus stop. No one cares that you’re an artist if your artproject is taking up seats at rush hour!

So how did these boys pull off this stunt?

Easy get everyone drunk, and then the natural order of sheepish agreement, will cause the pineapple to bloat in value.

That is why I think pineapple should be on a flag flown by all unionized art galleries “we smell the bullshit too” it will say, but in Latin of course

Gallery Pineapple Flag

Next year, “Watermelon on a War Chest”–mark my words.